Wait a Second…What? Some Nursery Rhymes are Questionable


I was reading Jacob some nursery rhymes from this book:

nursey rhyme book

Seems cute right? It’s filled with staples like the Incy Wincy Spider and Little Bo-Peep. And it even has some favourites like The Cat and the Fiddle.

Now, I remember singing some of these rhymes as a child and never questioning the words. For example, Rock-a-Bye Baby: “When the bough breaks the cradle will fall, and down will come baby, cradle and all.” Hmmmm. I have since changed the words to: “And Mom will catch baby, cradle and all.” Maybe I’ll resort back to the original story on future camping trips when I want to scare the kids.

Then I came across some even more weird ones. Like The Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe. Again, I remember hearing this story numerous times as a kid, but today, this is my reaction to it:

shocked
In case you haven’t read the original nursery rhyme, let me refresh your memory. Here is how it is written in this particular book:

There was an old woman
Who lived in a shoe
She had so many children
She didn’t know what to do.
She gave them some broth
Without any bread;
She whipped them all soundly
And put them to bed.

How heart-warming right? Perfect story for the kid who resists bedtime. Obviously a lot of old children’s literature was written to help teach kids about manners and behaving. I get that. But it still shocks me as I read it out loud to Jacob. My voice starts off very animated and perky, but by the time I’m reading “without any bread” I’m slowing down, my voice becomes more hushed, and I find myself not wanting to finish because I can sense what’s coming…the whipping!

Then there’s Ladybird, Ladybird; about a ladybug:

Ladybird, ladybird,
Fly away home,
Your house is on fire and
Your children are gone,
All except one
And that’s little Ann,
For she crept under
The frying pan.

What? What? WHAT? I have no words. Just this other face:

dissappointment

Hello, Friends! Yes, I’m Still Alive.


Excuse my absence, we’ve been busy…

Image

I can’t believe I haven’t written since September. There were dozens of fleeting moments when I had an idea for a post, but then life happened. Jacob is 18 months old now. So needless to say, he is on the move, and I am on the move after him – especially since he’s realized his love for toilets, and washing his hands in toilet water. Blerg. There goes the fight on germs.

This Christmas was outstanding! Jacob is old enough to understand what’s happening around him. It was so touching to see the wonder in his eyes when he’d gaze at the twinkling lights on the tree. Or when he finally caught on to the excitement of unwrapping presents. Kids really do bring out the magic of Christmas.

I hope you have all enjoyed your holidays and that the New Year is being good to you so far. You will be hearing from me more often as one of my resolutions this year is to NOT neglect writing. So let me know if there is anything specific you would like to hear about. Whether it’s more family recipes you’d like me to share, or if you want a product reviewed. And of course, I will always continue to write about my blunderings and embarrassing moments…like that time I waxed half my eyebrow off by accident.

Until next time! Keep things as sane as possible 😉

Cris

5 Things that Don’t Gross Me Out Since Becoming a Mom


nose

  1. Boogers – If I ever saw a booger hanging out of an unknowing nose, I’d start dry heaving on the spot. Since Jacob’s been born, boogers no longer bother me. Instead, I’m amazed at how many types there are and the size that can come out of a baby’s nose.
  2. Poop – Andrew’s always been in charge of cleaning the backyard after a long winter of Chester, our dog, going to the bathroom out there. The sight and smell would send me running inside like a bee was chasing me. Obviously this is something I had to overcome since having a baby. But for some reason it wasn’t hard. It came naturally – it’s like my senses are immune to some of the bombs Jacob takes. Sorry for the graphics, I know most mommy followers won’t even flinch when reading this though 😉
  3. Gunk in the sink drain – This has been something that’s grossed me out a long time. Seeing bits of food in the sink drain. I’d be scared to pick it up and empty its contents into the compost. Now I do it without even thinking about it.
  4. Spiders – Before Jacob, if I saw a spider I’d be frozen. I’d be scared to take my eyes off it in case it crawled away when I wasn’t looking and then I’d have no idea where it was. I’d holler for Andrew…who knew by the sound of my voice that it was spider-killing time and would show up with a paper towel to do the job. Today, if Jacob’s around and a spider is nearby I get protective rather than scared. I don’t use a paper towel though, that’s way too close for me. First I try drowning it in Raid, then if it’s still alive I’ll try smashing it with the hard-bristled broom, and if it’s STILL twitching its little legs, I suck it up with the vacuum.
  5. Vomit – This one’s up there with the poop. When you have a baby, there’s a lot of vomit involved so it’s something I’ve just gotten used to. Thankfully, spit up is what’s groomed me for vomit. It’s like vomit’s baby sister – smaller, less annoying and easier to clean.

Lost & Found


lostfound

It’s only been a month into nice weather and we’ve lost two hats. When I place a baseball cap on Jacob’s head, he feels inclined to take it off and examine it. When he’s done, I’m guessing he tosses it over the stroller as we’re walking. How I don’t trip over it or see it fly out of the stroller, I have no idea.

It’s a mystery to me. I imagine the hat, laying lonely near a bush somewhere, wondering why it’s suddenly alone. Half way through the walk I realize Jacob’s hatless and smiling. He’s won the battle of the baseball cap again!

I bought him a new hat. This time, it has little straps that clasp under his chin. He looks like a little explorer. He also has a hard time getting this one off, for now at least. Recently I also got him a pair of sandals. On a trip to the mall I noticed one missing. Great! After twenty minutes of retracing our steps we found it neatly placed on a bench. Someone knew we’d be missing it, and put it in plain view. Thank you, Good Samaritan.

I wonder how many more things we’ll lose on our little adventures. How many of Jacob’s things will be lonely in a lost-in-found box in the future?

One more thing. When Jacob was a few months old, we went on a family outing. We packed his diaper bag with all the goods. But when we arrived home from our journey the diaper bag was nowhere to be found. Till this day, we have no idea what happened to it. Andrew thinks he must have temporarily put it on the hood of the car while we were packing Jacob and the stroller away. Then we drove away…

I’m guessing we’ll have many more stories like these in the future. What have you lost in the battle of packing and unpacking your children and ALL the items that go with ‘em?

FIVE Things I’d like Jacob to Know


Jacob and Mommy

ONE: Bullying is unacceptable. I never want you to take someone else’s power away by using fear to make them do what you want them to do, or to simply make them feel bad. But if someone is pushing you around and there isn’t an adult close by to help, kick them in the groin and run to find an adult!

TWO: I don’t care what you do for a living. I care about how you’re living. I hope that you’re happy with your choices in life, and are a good person.

THREE: If you’re EVER feeling down, sad, or depressed, please tell dad or me. I hope that you’re never embarrassed to talk to us about your feelings. I’m going to try my best to always let you know that your feelings MATTER. Even if you think they seem silly, they’re still your feelings and they deserve respect!

FOUR: Choose your friends wisely. If they make you question whether you’re about to make a bad choice on more than one occasion, choose friends that don’t make life that complicated. Choose friends that you can be yourself with.

FIVE: I love you. There are going to be times when you can’t stand the sight of me and I’m okay with that. As long as you know that I’ll do anything to keep you safe and make you happy, that’s all that matters. Your parents love you very much. We may embarrass you, but we’ll always have your back.