I’m Stealth, Like a Ninja


While sneaking out of Jacob’s room this afternoon I was trying to avoid a floor board that creaks. In the middle of sneaking out, I realized how ridiculous I must look. One arm perched on the crib, the other straight out at the side of my body for balance, my leg extended before me, and my toe pointed to avoid the creaky board. It kinda looked like I was walking on an invisible tightrope.

As I realized how silly I must have looked I had to hold back my laughter or risk waking Jacob. But if there was a mirror in there and I caught a glimpse of myself it would have been over.

There are more and more moments like these since becoming a mom. Moments when I catch the crazy in me coming out. Not scary crazy; more like what-would-the-neighbors-think-if-they-saw-me crazy.

Here are a few examples that I’m sure many moms can relate to:

  • While trying to sweep the floor that’s in serious need of sweeping, especially since Jacob crawls now, I also have to entertain Jacob in his exersaucer. He clearly no longer wants to be in there since he wants to explore. So as I sweep, I’m singing into the broom as though it were a microphone while dancing (more like contorting) to please Jacob.
  • When Jacob is being finicky during a meal, something happens to me. I start talking to him in a voice that’s not mine – it’s a cross between Elmo and Toopy. But he loves it, and it gets him to take a few more mouthfuls of food.
  • Another thing that happens during feeding time is I catch myself opening and closing my mouth as I feed Jacob. My mouth hangs open like I’m waiting to be fed myself, not sure why I do this, but even though I’m aware that I do, I can’t stop.
  • If Andrew is handing me a diaper to throw in the trash and comments on what “a bomb” Jacob unleashed, before I have a chance to think I’m lifting the diaper to my nose to take a whiff. The second I dry heave I say out loud “Oh man! Why do I DO this to myself?” To which Andrew replies: “I dunno, but I think I would have done it too.” Isn’t that so weird? Sorry to gross anyone out haha!

What silly – or gross – things do you catch yourself doing since becoming a parent? Please tell me I’m not alone. I can’t be. 

5 thoughts on “I’m Stealth, Like a Ninja

  1. Chrissy……I used to all of the things that you have mentioned……..enjoy while it lasts…..they grow up too soon.

  2. Love the opening your mouth while putting a spoon in his—I remember doing that all the time!!!! Also, I remember a few times rocking the grocery cart back and forth in the check-out—–was so used to doing that with the stoller—-one lady asked once if I was okay!!! LOL enjoy every minute—-can’t believe mine are in school—I miss those days SOOOO much!!!!

  3. I think that moments like these are what makes life worth living
    …if you’re a parent at least
    …and if you can see the funny side and ridiculousness of it all, as you do.

    Okay wait so, correction….

    Having the ability to REALISE just how funny these moments are is what makes the life (of a parent) worth living!

    …or so I assume anyway since I’m not one

    Uh, I’m sorry this just makes my comment seem even less sane than it already didn’t!

    (what…that was so…what? “…less sane than it already didn’t” ?!!)

    Anyway, I think that moments like these, and being able to see the funny side in them, is what helps to keep parents SANE also!!

    Thanks for the lols 😀

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