I’ve been looking over my posts from the beginning. Most of them were written during what I refer to as “the dark days” of the first couple of months.
Nine months later, I can actually look back at them and smile. Relief floods over me as I thank God it got better. I remember thinking it never would. I felt like the sleepless nights and evenings of non-stop crying would last forever. Wow, how times have changed.
Today life’s full of giggles and play, strolls and messy meals, stories and songs, and lots of hugs and cuddles. What I’m trying to say is: it gets SO SO SO much better and fun. Once you have a routine set and get to know your little one’s needs, life becomes a little simpler.
The “dark days” seem like they weren’t so dark. And believe it or not, I’m already pining for another little baby. I want my family to grow even more. I’m forgetting how exhausting the first couple of months were, and instead, remember how easily Jacob fit into the crook of my arm and how he nestled his little head into my neck. At nine months, he’s already squirming out of my arms. Since he’s started crawling, he wants to break free from mummy’s grip and explore his world.
Every day I wonder what type of boy he’ll become. What kind of man he’ll grow into. I love watching him watch things. We have some potted plants on a wall shelf in the kitchen, and while he sits in his highchair as I feed him, he gazes at these plants with wonder. I forget sometimes that he’s seeing most things for the very first time. He’s so curious about everything. I’ve let him feel the leaves with his little fingers. At first he’s cautious and gentle, and then, he yanks a leaf off with fierceness so he can bring it where? To his mouth of course!
He’s becoming more aware of Pepper our cat and Chester our dog. They used to carefully sniff him when they could, and now that he’s crawling, they’re darting out of his way because they know he’ll be after their wagging tails. Right now, Jacob likes Pepper more. I think it’s because Pepper’s more his size whereas Chester towers over him. It melts my heart how close their all becoming. Jacob looks at them as toys right now, but as he gets older, he’ll love them like we do. The pets already love Jacob. I can see it when Pepper meows as he walks over to Jacob, purrs, and rubs his head over Jacob’s feet. And Chester will clumsily saunter over to Jacob on the exersaucer and stick his wet nose into Jacob’s neck, taking in the baby scent that’s already beginning to fade.
I love our little family. I’m glad the “dark days” are over, and I can finally say: it was all completely worth and I’ll do it all over again.